Wednesday, 19 August 2015

Writing sample

Description: In writing we have been given a task to write a story about a picture. We could write it in different ways like a narrative, news report Etc. I choose news report. We had to make up a story that matchs the genre we choose. The motivation came from the picture we were writing about. 

Here is the photo: 
Here is my story





Big Idea: I have been learning sentences, For example complex sentences. My specific goal is F,A,N,B,O,Y,S What means For, And, Nor, But, Or, Yet, So. I decied to do FANBOYS as my goal because I am not using it in my writing. After writing this story I went through and added some more detail and impact. I have learnt to add complex sentences for example david scanned the hall looking for the culprit, while addressing the school.

Feedback/feedfoward: I like how you hooked the reader and add impact. Maybe next time you could add more fan boys and maybe complex sentences. -Zara

Evaluation: I think i did a really good job at making it like a news report but I could improve on putting some fanboys into my writing.



1 comment:

  1. Aria, you are such a creative writer and you make your writing so easy to read. Your goal of using FANBOYS helps give your sentences a different angle, making them less repetitive. Next time think about using paragraphs to break up the writing for the reader making it easier for them to follow.

    ReplyDelete